Dizzy stares at the door, and squeezes Oliver's hand as tightly as she can.
Macglynn looks to steel himself as well before pushing the door open.
Senkha is still taking deep, steadying breaths and shaking enough that her legs are still squeaking. Loudly.
Macglynn shuts the door behind them and looks at Senkha. He smiles. "Ha' y'feelin'."
Dizzy edges behind Oliver slightly.
Senkha keeps her eyes closed, swallowing hard. "Oliver, I'd like to speak with Dizzy alone, please."
Macglynn blinks at you.
Macglynn looks down at Dizzy and squeezes her hand before letting it go. "Ah'll be right outsahd, then."
Dizzy shoots Oliver a desperate "OH GOD PLEASE DON'T" look before letting go of his hand and moving closer to the bed.
Macglynn does anyway. He doesn't look happy, but this needs to resolve itself. He turns and exits the room.
Senkha takes several minutes before finally opening her eyes and looking at Dizzy. She manages to keep a flat expression for a moment before softening. She pats the bed beside her, holding out her arms. "C'mere."
Macglynn whispers: There's a definite tension about him. A lot hangs on this, and the only thing he wants is everybody to be happy. He's not sure if that's possible, though. Hence the tension.
Macglynn whispers: Despite this, he does have one unrelated thought- Son of a bitch, I left my pipe in the room.
You all know the feeling, being stuck in a room with just you and your parent. You know you fucked up royally and you know your mom knows too. The already large room just seems even emptier and lonelier when Oliver leaves. When Senkha opens her arms, Dizzy just freezes for a moment. One step, another step, after what feels like an eternity Dizzy stumbles to the bed, and falls into her mother's arms. All done carefully enough to avoid the larger than life leg braces.
Dizzy doesn't say anything, just buries her face in her mother's chest and shudders a silent sob.
To Macglynn: Senkha isn't concerned with happiness anymore...it's something that will change and something that will never last. No, she's more concerned with that this whole thing is fucked up and despite everything, despite all that she's been through, it's on -her- to fix it.
Senkha holds Dizzy close, pressing her cheek against the girl's hair, not crying herself, but close enough to it. After a moment of just sitting there, and as if coming to a decision within herself, she whispers, "I love you, Monkey."
Macglynn whispers: He doesn't seem to feel bad for acknowledging it does rest on her. Adopting her was her decision as much as his, and while he feels guilty for pressuring her into saying yes, for once he knows: she could have said no.
Macglynn whispers: He is curious, though, if this decision of hers is real. Does she really love her?
Dizzy 's silent crying stops as soon as it starts. Her arms tighten around Senkha, "I love y'too."
To Macglynn: It's genuine. That's the difficult thing about it: no matter what's happened, fuck her life, she loves this little pain-in-the-ass child. She brushes aside the objections she might have to Oliver's thoughts about this being on her shoulders, because it does rest on her: it's her name on those papers, not his. And if she made this bed, she'll damn well lie in it.
Senkha takes another deep, shaking breath and presses her lips against Dizzy's head. "I know I promised you I wouldn't see you differently. I'm sorry that I had to break that promise...just that you -are- different."
Senkha says: Still my Monkey, though.
Dizzy nods a little, but remains silent. How are you supposed to defend yourself to that? How are you supposed to respond at all? She just gazes up at Senkha, a rare maturity shown on her face. It might be the same face that laughed as Senkha screamed back in the desert. But anyone could tell that it is a different person.
Macglynn whispers: Oliver seems proud of this decision. Proud, yet apologetic- I'm sorry I brought this on you. But thank you for sticking with me through it.
Senkha cringes slightly as she sees that look, remembering the last time she saw it, and shakes her head as if to remind herself: different place, different person, different circumstances. Don't be your mother, Senkha. Don't push her away. She manages a smile.
Senkha says: It's not a bad thing, you know. Changing means you're growing up, and I'm proud of you.
To Macglynn: She has no response to this. What could she say--you're welcome? It's my pleasure? All she can do is think of how much she hopes it'll be different this time around and how afraid she is that it won't be.
Dizzy heaves a sigh, "I don't like th'reasons why I changed." She can feel her cringe, and she quickly turns her face away.
Senkha lifts her hand and turns Dizzy to face her again. She smiles, sadly. "People never do. Most of the things that changed me are things I wish had never happened." She shifts her legs under the blankets with a loud screech.
Dizzy 's turn to cringe now. She tenses until the sound stops, but her grip on her mother's arm takes longer to loosen."'m sorry I was a mistake." Her voice is soft. She doesn't mean it in a backhanded comment kind of way.
Dizzy says: Shoulda jus' left you alone.
Senkha closes her eyes; Light-bless, who's been talking to this child and telling her Senkha's inner fears? "Not a mistake," she says after a long minute, thinking about how to phrase it. "Adopting you was something I didn't think through and did for the wrong reasons. That doesn't mean that I want to take it back--take you back. Just that...well. Sometimes, I don't know if Oliver and I are what's best for -you- is all."
Senkha says: It's not because I don't love you. It's because...well, when I look at everything that's happened, I have to ask myself if we're really good parents that we can't stop you from getting hurt so often.
Dizzy 's voice is soft, "I don't wanna go..."
Senkha sighs and shakes her head. "You're not going anywhere. Except to school. Dizzy, did I ever tell you about how I fell in love with your Daddy?"
Dizzy shakes her head.
Senkha says: We'd only been...well, dating sounds childish, but "seeing each other" for three days at that point. Your grandfather told me that Oliver was in love with me and that if I didn't love him, too, he'd go insane and kill himself.
Senkha sighs, shifting against the pillows and making a face as she tries to rearrange her legs with much noise. "So I decided, that night, that I was in love with your father. I don't know how well thought-out the decision was, or if it was the best decision I could've made at the time, but I've never gone back on it. Just like I won't go back on loving you."
Dizzy blinksblinks, "He- what?"
Senkha chuckles, mostly to herself. "Dad was just fibbing because he thought the two of us deserved a little happiness, and trust me, I gave him a piece of my mind when I found out."
To Macglynn: Of course, Oliver almost losing his mind when they went back to old Stratholme didn't help him seem much saner, but who's counting? Senkha is feeling more okay by the minute.
Dizzy frowns, "'s not very nice of him." Another sigh, another hug. "I'll be real good at school. I mean, I dunno about the school part but I mean I will be nice."
Macglynn whispers: Oliver laughs to himself. It's true, I gave you just as much trouble as she has.
Senkha grins wryly. "It was just a little trick to get us moving forward. I'm over it. And I know you will be. Dizzy...school isn't punishment for you. I think you'll have a really good time."
Senkha says: And it's just during the day. You get to come home at night, have dinner with me and Daddy, talk about your day. You've got -so- much potential, and I just want to make sure you're able to be the best woman you can be.
To Macglynn: Yes. You did. Why do I put up with you again? He'd feel a tickling at the back of his neck...
There's a thud outside, followed by a, "Dammit!"
Dizzy nods again, "Okay." A slight smile has returned, "Okay. That sounds kinna nice. Mebbe be a bit more norm'ler too."
Senkha laughs, in spite of herself. "And Light knows we're completely normal," she chuckles. "Dizz, I promise I'll keep trying if you will. This isn't going to be easy. There are going to be times when I'll look at you and remember how much...remember the way things hurt. And you'll do the same with me. It won't be easy, but if it was easy to love someone, it wouldn't be worth it, would it?"
Dizzy 's smile grows, "I'll try for you. No wait- ain't gunna try. I will do it. I will." For a brief moment, she almost forgets the less than ideal situation they are in. She doesn't see the braces or shadow burns or bruises. "I swear."
Senkha grins at Dizzy. "I know you will. You're a brave, strong, beautiful gi-- young woman. Light, you're sixteen years old." She pauses and then asks. "...do you remember when your actual birthday is?" Really stupid question, she knows.
Dizzy frowns slightly as she digs through the mountain of regained lost memories. "I- they-" She bites her lip. "It didn't matter t'them."
Senkha says: So November seventh, then.
Senkha 's smile grows a little mischievous.
Dizzy smiles, and nods a little. "Yeah."
Senkha hugs Dizzy tightly again. "Well. It matters to us, your birthday. Especially as you become more and more of a lady. And actually..." She lowers her voice significantly.
To Macglynn: ~smokescreen~!
Senkha whispers in Dizzy's ear, "I was wondering if you could help me make a surprise party for your Daddy."
Macglynn whispers: Indignance! Why are there suddenly secrets?
Dizzy 's grin widens, "I would like that very much. 'cuz I think my card had lotsa bad timing."
Senkha says: Your card? When did you make him a card?
Macglynn says: What th' hell are you two talkin' about in there.
Dizzy says: After I woke up- NOTHIN' NO EAVESDROPPIN'!
Macglynn stares at the door. "Wha-"
Senkha whispers to Dizzy, "We'll talk about it later," and then louder, "Fine, come in, since you insist on listening anyway." She shakes her head, chuckling.
Macglynn opens the door. "Makes me think yer talkin' about me, it does."
Macglynn folds his arms.
Senkha grins over Dizzy's head. "We were, and you know it. About how crazy you are."
Macglynn says: Ah'm not gunna get inna a debate over who's th' craziest in this room.
Senkha says: So! Once I'm able to sit up longer, I'll write to the headmistress and see about you starting classes soon. I really think you'll like it, Dizzy.
Macglynn nudges the back of Dizzy's head. "An' if y'don't, tough luck."
Dizzy frowns, "Only if I get to color lots."
Senkha 's expression grows slightly stern, though she's still smiling. "Mm, you're going to have to do what your teachers say. That's all part of growing up, Monkey."
Macglynn says: We'll make sure t'find yuh a place whut 'as plenty 'a art classes, though. Ha' 'bout that.
Senkha says: Or we'll find you an art tutor for the weekends.
Dizzy waves around her imaginary brush, "Gunna paint those things that you see on walls."
Senkha says: Murals?
Dizzy says: Yeah.
Senkha says: Mm, that'll be a good idea. You still need to learn to read and write, though. And to defend yourself.
Macglynn laughs. "When yer done wi' this, you'll be teachin' -me- t' write, Ah bet."
Dizzy says: I betcha I could teach you real good too.
Senkha smirks. "You have to learn a bit better before you can start teaching your Daddy things. You're both at about the same level now."
Macglynn 's shoulders sag. At the same level as a retard.
Dizzy says: Well I'm a real retikerlated person. I betcha I could do it.
Senkha says: ...retikerlated?
Macglynn says: ... See? Yer a'ready usin' words Ah don't know.
Dizzy frowns, "... reticulated?"
Dizzy says: No wait-
Dizzy says: Artikerlated.
Dizzy nods sagely.
Senkha says: Articulate.
Macglynn says: ...
Dizzy says: 's what I said.
Senkha says: Mm-mm, try again. Articulate.
Dizzy says: 'tickerlate.
Senkha says: Ar-tic-u-late.
Dizzy says: Articul-ated.
Senkha smiles. "Now take off the D at the end. Articulate."
Dizzy says: Articulate.
Senkha 's grin grows much wider; for some reason, this simple feat makes her look ready to burst with pride. "That's it! And yes, you are articulate."
Dizzy puffs her chest out proudly. Yeah, she so good.
Macglynn smiles. Maybe the world isn't ending.
Senkha says: See, that's the kind of thing you'll learn at school. That way, if you're ever wanting to talk to people who aren't able to understand you as well as we can, you'll be able to.
Dizzy says: Okay! Okay! I said I'd go and be good.
Senkha ruffles Dizzy's hair; doing so causes her sleeve to fall back and reveals the ugly purple burns on her arm. She doesn't seem to notice them to start. "I know you will. You'll make us all proud."
Macglynn glances to the burns, and his smile softens slightly. He sits down in front of them on the bed.
Dizzy says: When are we going home?
Senkha 's smile fades significantly. Now she sees the burns on her arm and tries to shake her sleeve down to cover them. It doesn't quite work; she glances over at Oliver as if asking him.
Macglynn says: Not jus' yet, though trust me, we want outta here.
Dizzy smiles, "I like th'boat but there are so many people. An' they 'r louder 'n me."
Senkha is still shaking her arm to try and cover up those burns. "They are. Don't seem to understand the concept of privacy, either."
Dizzy says: Well that is super rude.
Dizzy might be kind of a hypocrite.
Macglynn blinks and reaches out to pull her sleeve over the burns. He looks at her as he does this, hoping to make eye contact.
Senkha catches Oliver's eye and bites her lower lip, looking embarrassed. Despite this, she comments almost airily, "Well, Light bless them for their aide and hospitality, but the guests of the White Sigil have really never been known for their tact or manners."
Macglynn 's eyes close and his hand drops from her arm. He's laughing.
Dizzy blinks, holy crap he's laughing.
Senkha smiles as well, though not quite laughing.
Dizzy just smiles from ear to ear. She missed this.
Senkha says: Tell you what, Monkey. I'm going to give you an important job. Your Daddy's going to stay in here with me, and I need you to guard the door for us. I'll let you know every day who's okay to let in here. Everyone else, tell 'em to go love a bird.
Dizzy salutes smartly, "I can do that real good." Unsure if Senkha wants to be hugged or not, she just patpats her hand and wiggles off the bed. "I'M THE GUARD NOW."
Macglynn blinks at Dizzy.
Macglynn says: ... Well, that saves me th' trouble 'a bootin' folk out, Ah guess.
Senkha blinks as Dizzy takes her suggestion and goes to guard immediately. She starts to say "I didn't mean now..." but eventually just shrugs and sighs. "Mostly because you don't give a whit if she tells tactless morons where to shove it." Senkha grins.
Macglynn says: It's true.
Senkha says: Double standard.
Macglynn says: Not denyin' it.
Senkha says: Mm, but you're mad at Dad for doing the same thing.
Macglynn says: Yeah. Guess Ah am.
Macglynn says: Easier t' excuse kids bein' assholes'n grownups, though, heh.
Senkha tilts her head to grin at Oliver. "Easier to excuse cripples being assholes than people who can walk," she adds.
Senkha says: Not that I'm taking that as an excuse.
Senkha says: Just saying.
Senkha says: Assholes are assholes, age and bum legs notwithstanding.
Macglynn says: Yeah, yeah. Well. If she keeps folk out, then Ah suhjest not complainin'.
Senkha is still grinning, almost playfully. "Not me I'm worried about. I wouldn't complain if everyone were assholes to keep people out."
Macglynn says: Uh-huh.
Macglynn says: ...
Macglynn says: Hey.
Senkha says: Hmm.
Macglynn says: Ah mean' it. Thanks fer stickin' with this.
Senkha exhales quietly, her smile fading. "I never really had a choice from the get-go," she admits in a low voice. "By the time I met Dizzy, you would've died for her anyway, and it was either go along with you or lose you."
Senkha says: I made this choice. You know me well enough to know that I only run away from nasty battles...not from responsibility.
Macglynn laughs. "One could argue this's been somethin'a a nasty battle itself, eh?"
Senkha 's smile returns somewhat. "You could, yeah. Or at least fraught with nasty battle after nasty battle. Either way...I can't do to her what my mother did to me. I love her too much."
Macglynn pulls Senkha close, not minding the sound of her braces screeching. "Y'ain't a bad mother, n'matter whut y'think."
For some reason, this of all things breaks Senkha's composure. Just a bit--not enough to elicit outright sobbing--but enough that her voice cracks when she says, "I feel like the worst mother in the world."
Macglynn says: That honor goes t'yer own mother, don't y'think? Don't compare yerself t' that... look ha' happy y'make her. Look at all y'done an' gone through. Whether it's made y'scared 'a her or not... y'done great things fer her.
Senkha has leaned forward so that her forehead is against Oliver's chest. Her voice is somewhat muffled as she asks, "Like what?"
Macglynn says: Whuttya mean 'lahk whut'?
Senkha says: What've I done for her?
Macglynn says: Y'gave her a lahf far better'n th' one she had, an' hell- d'ya not remember all them tahms y'went runnin' after her? Y'may 'a hated it, but Light, no bad mother'd do that.
Senkha says: ...who in their right mind would let a child stay held by a madman? Light, I might've done that without being her mother.
Macglynn sighs. "D'y'see whut yer doin' here? Yer lookin' fer ev'ry excuse y'can t' call yerself a bad mother when y'done nuthin' but good. So we fucked up a bit with keepin' 'er disciplined- that was both 'a us."
Senkha says: ...I just don't know what I've done for her by being her mother that I wouldn't have done, say, if I was one of the Sigil. I mean...Light, half the Sigil went chasing after her all those times, too.
Macglynn just shrugs, shaking his head. "Well y'know whut? She seems t' love an' look up t' you a whole lot, an' Ah don't think she would if y'was doin' a bad job."
Senkha says: I know. I know. Just...nngh. Other people seem to have such an easy time of this motherhood thing.
Macglynn says: Y'know, Ah doubt they really do. An' b'sides-- Ah dun' think other mothers gotta deal with quaht th' level 'a bullshit you do.
Macglynn smirks slyly at you.
Senkha says: Probably not. I think I've just managed to win the familial lottery with the two of you.
Senkha says this deadpan, though Oliver could probably hear the smile behind her voice.
Macglynn says: Hey. hey. -You- picked -me-.
Macglynn says: Ah didn' want nuthin'a do with it! But no, y'had t'push it!
Senkha looks up at Oliver without moving her head. "How dare I. Tell you what, let's just forget the whole thing, then. My bad for pushing it." She's still deadpan.
Macglynn says: We're done here, then.
Macglynn moves to get off the bed.
Too bad Senkha's latched her arms around his waist, then. She's still looking up at him with a flat expression, but he's going to have to drag her with him if he goes anywhere.
Macglynn frowns. He swings his legs over the side of the bed and stands, with her still latched. He turns around so he's looking down at her as she clings to his waist.
Senkha 's braces screech horribly at this motion, though she eventually lets go, the playfulness gone from her eyes as one of her legs bends awkwardly and she can't unbend it. She gives a hiss of pain, sitting back upright.
Macglynn 's eyes widen and he reaches forward, arms around her shoulders. "Shit! Light, Ah didn' mean t'-"
Senkha shakes her head, trying to fix her legs. It's not working at all; those braces just won't move. "Not--nnh--not your f-fault...Light, -FUCK- this hurts..."
Macglynn pushes the blankets aside, reaching out himself to her legs. He gently puts a hand under her right one, easily lifting the heavy brace to put it in a more comfortable position.
Macglynn whispers: - He opens the bond willingly, unusual for him, and uses her pain as a guide. How he adjusts her leg is based entirely on what he feels from her.-
Macglynn slowly lowers her leg at an angle where the pain dulls.
To Macglynn: It wouldn't be the worst pain in the world, but the kind of thing that it would be annoying not to change, like sitting with your leg bent funny usually is. With the bond open, he can also sense how exhausting this night was for her, emotionally. How she just wants to be held.
Senkha cringes slightly at the movement but exhales in relief when her leg is set right.
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